At the end of the day, it's not so much whether or not Mir's portrayal of motherhood is actually more in line with her reality than Naomi's. As Hall explains, Foucault told us that there is no one absolute truth, "but a discursive formation sustaining a regime of truth." He gives the example that children of single parents may or may not actually be more delinquent, but if, as a society, we hold this to be true, and punish single parents and their children, then this may become 'true' as a result. Similarly, mommy blogs create a discursive formation that sustains a regime of truth about motherhood.
This discourse is encoded by mommy bloggers, as they select which parts of their experiences as mothers to share with readers. Naomi chooses to encode a very positive motherhood – not perfect, but where the negatives are just little speed bumps on an overall smoothly paved road. Mir encodes a different motherhood, where the road winds a bit more, and there are some pretty nasty potholes along the way (though I suppose Naomi’s encountered some potholes, too – literally). And then it’s our job as a reader to decode these messages. I will decode them differently than anyone else. What I see as an unattainable, picture-perfect portrayal of motherhood, inline with hegemonic ideals, might be to someone else a positive inspiration to work through their own trials and tribulations. Given that we are all decoding differently, it’s hard to ultimately decide if a blog is radical.
It’s not so simply and straightforward to say Rockstar Diaries isn’t radical, but Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda is. And even if that is the case, that doesn’t make one better than the other. As a reader, I have different affective responses to different mommy blogs. Sometimes I laugh, from time to time I’ve cried, and sometimes I’m immensely frustrated. But either way I keep reading – and there’s something to that.
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